Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Workout Rule #1: Don’t Be a Hero

I’ve made it up to P90X’s Chest/Shoulders/Triceps routine (insert falling confetti here). Woohoo!

faceplantshame

I’ve completed the other P90X arm workouts without a problem, so I figured this one would be a piece of cake. (Wait for it…)

In fact, after yesterday’s lower body routine, I actually thought I was giving myself a little “break”. My thoughts went something like this: “Of course I can do a one-hour arm workout! No problem! Bring it on!”

So, I entered the my spacious gym living room, loaded the DVD, and felt the pride swell inside my head. (Wait for it…)

Things were going great—really, really great—until something like, the 20,000,000th push-up variation known as “pike” push-ups. Basically you make an upside down “V” with your body (feet flat on the floor, butt up in the air, back straight, hands on the ground) and perform “maximum reps” from this position. (Get ready…)

Now, my arms were already feeling quite Jell-oesque  by this point, and I really wasn’t sure how many of those suckers I could crank out. But—being the total crackerhead that I am—I went for it. “Bring it on, Tony!” I muttered at the TV.

I planted my feet, positioned my hands, hiked my fanny… and my arms immediately started to shake.  (Think: San Francisco. 1906…)

I forced 7 reps and then it happened.

My arms suddenly gave out and I firmly—emphasis on the “firmly”—planted my face into the carpet. Which, all up close ‘n personal, smelled distinctly like dog. Ahem.

I then heard Tony Horton’s voice (Mr. P90 Blah-Dee-Blah) blaring through my TV: “Don’t be a hero! It’s maximum reps! If you can’t maintain good form—you’re done!”

Humph. Now he tells me….

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